Real Imagination

Self Analysis

2011-10-02T06:19:00.000-07:00

Real and the imaginary self.

Real actions, imaginary thoughts. Thoughts without any action. Actions not thoughtful enough. Actions are just a response now. Like dodging a bullet. Thoughts are tired. Thoughts are dwindling. I am losing my imaginary self. My reality is just a response to someone else's. Its not my reality. My imaginary self is my reality. Your reality is not mine. I don't live in your world. I don't live in your world.

Peace with time

2011-01-08T05:51:00.000-08:00

I have made my peace with time. I remember one of the crazy things that I once tried to do. I tried concentrating all my energies to stop the time (this was nothing more than closing my eyes, thinking just about what I wanted it to be like, and giving up once I realized it was not happening at all!). I did it, it was intense and I failed. I probably stopped the time in the respect that the moment got permanently etched in my memory, though not the result I was looking for. I probably wanted it to manifest itself as a complete absence of any physical movement, ageing or thought.

I haven't thought about it, I am not sure I completely understand what time really means. I can feel it, I think about it, I want to grab hold of it sometimes. The concept of a passing time is what really invokes emotions and rids me of emotions.

Ennui, frustration, restlessness, hope, happiness, pleasure : all emotions have invisible strings that bind them to the concept of time.

I get this wonderful feeling observing the time passing by now. It is such a grand concept, so much bigger that the concepts of love, life, civilization. Imagine thousands of years from now and the time would still tick, it would exist regardless there is life of not. Whether there is love or not. I feel so powerless and so does everything else, what a relaxing feeling.

One morning

2010-12-26T02:23:00.000-08:00

See the smoke from a distance
Disappearing slowly into nothingness

Listen to the beats of a train
Taking you to a place far away

Smell the burning cigarette

Shadows from a bright sun
Moving at the pace of the universe

Why are these people running
Are they running to or running from

The bitterness of this coffee
The bean that was bitter
Or was is the bitterness wrapped in a bean

music by: Paul Krakbrenner

Old horse

2010-10-02T09:21:00.000-07:00

Time passed by me,
you see.
It just did, it passed by me again.
I just grew a little older.

I used to make memories then
Not knowing I would look back with a longing.
Never really wished bring me back those days
Those days are safe in past, like this one will be.

One me trapped inside another
Both sad because of one another
And both of them grew old as the time
As it passed by me.

One

2010-08-07T14:25:00.000-07:00

Concept is a concept is a concept is a vicious infinite regress.